2020-06-29 08:30:41 UTC
WE ARE THE 80'S
WE ARE THE 80'S
WE ARE THE 80'S
THE ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN:
"The Unknown People". Clark and Lois investigate why the world's
deepest oil drill suddenly closed up. It turns out they hit a cavern of
sone sort and pulled up some radioactive materials, leading the owner
to think the Earth is hollow. Naturally, a couple hairy dwarves crawled
up the shaft to investigate, leading to all sorts of trouble. This ep
was actually the "Superman VS the Mole Men" movie, retitled for TV!
"The Sport of Penguins/A Horse of Another Color". The Penguin is after a rare
book on parasols located at The Gotham Library. Luckily, Barbara Gordon, ex-
fiance of The Penguin and alias of Batgirl, happens to work at the library.
Meanwhile, Pengy seems to be making a bid at horse racing as well, in cahoots
with the beautiful Lola Lasagna
"The Man Who Made Volcanos". We begin with a scientist testing his volcano
ray in some rocky desert. Hey, isn't that where the Gorn lives? After
creating a volcano in China, he hints at something more ominous to come
before the opening credits begin.
Steve meets Diana at LAX as she leaves, pretending to be reading a
newspaper. Diana sees him, then remembers she's sppsd to be acting like
she doesn't know him. Thanks to expositionary dialouge, we learn that
Steve got promoted while Diana was on a mission in the Philipines. He
tells her that scientists said the a volcano that recently erupted in
China was unexpected and she's to followup on the last agent who was
last seen getting his hotel room in Baja. Meanwhile, at a undisclosed
Chinese restaurant, a man arrives accompanied by ominous chinky-sounding
cheesy Chinese music. The Calgon Man, wearing a ridiculous Chinese costume,
muses over an ancient wooden printing block, then introduces his poorly-
disguised female coworker for the mission who then karate-chops the wood
block in half and calls her coworker a capitalst chauvenist. Back at the
airport, an oriental man tails Diana Prince as she boards a plane to Mexico,
quickly followed by the two Chinese agents. Once in Baja, Diana Prince drives
a dune buggy to what appears to be a ghost town. She stops at a hotel run by
Roger Davis and requests room seven, the room of the missing AIDC agent.
Diana snoops around her room while Roger Davis calls the scientist from a
secret radio in the basement, but he already knows she's there and orders her
to be eliminated. Outside, the two Chinese spies decided to spend the night
in their car watching Diana. Diana finds a note hidden under one of the
bedposts, which for some reason triggers an alarm in Roger Davis's office.
That makes no sense at all! Pat opens a trap door in her second floor room,
dumping Diana into one of those pit traps with with walls to crush whoever
is insde. Wait, whut?
When we return from commercial break, Diana twirls into Wonder Woman and
holds the walls at bay, then punches a hole through the wall to escape.
The mad scientist activates a volcano in the Soviet Union. Back at the
AIDC, Joe gives a report on the incident to Steve, telling him that
witnesses say they saw weird lights in area before the volcano erupted.
Wait, does Joe work for Steve now? I am so confused by this! That
morning, a pair of Soviet agents arrive au pied at the hotel in Baja
and, seeing the Chinese spies sleeping in car, comment on how soft they
are for not sleeping under the open sky on the ground. Diana Prince
leaves the hotel, followed by the Chinese and Soviet agents. Back at the
mad scientist's super secret base, he tells Roger Davis to get ready
to push the button. Diana follows her map to the base, located atop a steep
cliff and almost twirls into Wonder Woman when the Chinese agents arrive. The
female tries to subdue Diana in a karate catfight accompanied by more of that
dreadful chinky-sounding Chinese music but fails, so the guy stops the fight
by brandishing his gun. The Chinese think America is behind the volcano and
refuse to listen to Diana's side of the story while unseen by them, the
Soviet agents arrive on foot.
The scientist creates a volcano in America while forcing the lost agent to
watch. Wait, why wasnt he crushed to death in that pit trap Diana escaped?
The Chinese agents assume China got hit again, but realize the beam direction
is wrong, so they have no idea what happened. The Chinese agents and Diana
take a forced hike up montain with the Soviets in close pursuit. Diana does a
little Stockholm syndrome about them being conquered throughout history but
always defeating their conquerers. The agents decide to leave Diana behind
for some reason. After they leave, she quickly shreds her ropes and twirls
into Wonder Woman, just in time for the soviets agents to pass. The Soviets
catch up with the Chinese and Wonder Woman interupts them to plays "bullets
and bracers" and to wrestle Sergie, who once wrestled a grzzly bear. Is his
last name "Putin", perchance? Roger Davis and some goons arrive with guns to
interupt the festivities.
After the commercial break, Roger Da vis threatens the group if they don't
surrender and Wonder Woman runs away. Roger Davis decides Diana Prince will
do and goes looking for her. Oh no! Diana attempts to tie herself up before
Roger Davis arrives. He tells her the missing agent is OK and wonders how she
escaped the death trap. Diana tells him Wonder Woman rescued her. Back at the
AIDC, Joe tells Steve more about the case. Why is Joe acting like Steve's
secretary? Diana is taken to the mad scientist and immediately recognises him
as Arthur Chapman, then expositions how they met a couple years ago. Arthur
is embittered about not getting paid for his inventions and about them being
used for weapons. He wants to stop war and enforce world peace with his
volcano-maker. He then interupts all radio and TV broadcasting in the world
to announce his plans. Steve and Joe exposition about Arthur some more while
watching the show. To prove he can do it, Arthur gives some propriatary
coordinates instead of using longitude and lattitude to create a volcano in
the Black Hills, where no one will get hurt. Umm, what? He then threstens to
make entire world into a volcano if they don't give up their weapons. As we
head to commercial, Diana is like "Oh shit! He IS crazy!".
Diana makes a break for it, evades the guards, and twirls into Wonder
Woman. Meanwhile, Steve and Joe are amazed that no one got hurt by the
Black Hills volcano, but seem to have forgotten about the previous ones
he created. Joe tells Steve the world leaders are ready to attack or
nuke Arthur's base but don't want to harm the (five or six) hostages. As
Arthur rants some more. Wonder Woman busts in through the door. Wonder
Woman tries to disuade him from doing this and Roger Davis agrees. Oooh,
burn! The Soviet and Chinese agents also agree. As soon as Wonder Woman
convinces Arthur to give up, he gets a telegram that the bombing will begin
will six minutes. Enraged, Arthur triggers a doomday setting, so Wonder Woman
runs off to stop it. By standing in front of the beam. For thirty seconds.
Later, back in Chinatown, that ruined ancient printing block is reconnected
as the two agents hold hands and announce they wish to retire as a married
couple. Diana hints about the woman wanting to have children and their boss
suggests they "get lost in Chinatown" after dinner. Are they saying Chinese
spies are not allowed to retire? Over dinner, the boss says he wants to meet
Wonder Woman some day, to whch Diana replies "I think she'll like Chinese
food as much as I do!" and laughs. It's not THAT funny, Diana!
"Marabunta". An army of killer ants proves to be Sheena and Cutter's greatest
challenge after the little critters trap them in a shack. The special FX for
ants in Kingdom of the Ants was more believable.
"Rescue". Dar and Tao must once again set out to rescue Kyra from the
Terrons. Did I mention I now remember I wasn't really watching Beastmaster
for the adventures of Dar and Tau. The godlings(?) have far more interesting
things going on! The sorceress figured out how to undo, if temporarily, her
master's spell on hawkman and King Zad's 2nd in command from last week staged
"Dancing on the Razor". The GSA and Mutant X race to find a recording of
their fight that could expose them both to public scrutiny. It turns out the
guy Mutant X rescued from the GSA was a reporter who made the recording.
"The Watchers". Duncan's search for Darrious's killers leads him to The
Watchers and their leader who owns a bookstore. Hey, it's new season of
Highlander with better opening credits! As it turns out, one of Joe's
subordinates had gone rogue without his knowledge.
WAR OF THE WORLDS:
"My Soul to Keep". The aliens are trying to hatch their eggs in a nice cooler
place so they ntake over an ice factory but seem to have forgotten they
already have freon and refridgeration equipment to live in that cave in
Nevada. Meanwhile, Quinn, the rogue alien from several eps ago told Suzanne's
ex-huband reporter that his wife and the Blackwood project are a secret death
squad killing illegal aliens, which makes zero sense b/c he left on good
terms with Blackwood.
LIFE, LIBERTY, & LEVIN:
Civil rights attorney Leo Terrell and Allen West, former Florida congressman
and retired Army lieutenant colonel, join Mark Levin to discuss race
relations in America.
PARANORMAL CAUGHT ON CAMERA:
A mother and daughter team investigate a haunted basket. A high level
reconnaissance marine sees something in the sky that amazes him. Two intrepid
investigators come face to faceless with the slenderman. This questionable
show lost me at Slenderman, an urban legend created within the last decade on
a scary story website.
"Baby Stewie". Stewie builds a DNA-altering machine that will allow him to
remain smart forever, but the invention has the adverse effect and he instead
transforms into what he should have always been - an actual baby. This was an
odd episode, but worth it to watch Brian drown himself in the toilet. I hated
the Cleveland short.
What did you watch?
Democrats and the liberal media hate President Trump more than they
love this country.