Post by Ian J. BallPost by UbiquitousWhat did you watch?
soaps: Y&R - Wed's ep. This was such a nullity of an episode, that I
don't think there was anything worth synopsizing except that Chelsea is
just an incredible loser, falling back into Adam's lap. [roll]
DOOL - Fri's ep. This ep was also mostly a loser - if it hadn't had
sweet Holly The Brat, it might have been a total write-off! And I still
don't like the NuSophia compared to the old one... Holly tells Maggie
that Doug III is into her, and claims that she's not, but at worst she
seems ambivalent about it (and, at best, Holly can probably parlay this
into a Devil's threesome if she knows what she's doing!! :p ).
NuSophia lies about Johnny and Chanel to her mommy, and then drops a
surprise lunch with her mommy on them. Johnny and Chanel talk over the
adoption angle with grandma and mom, respectively. I don't think
anything else happened here.
Strange Darling (Pee+) - A highly stylized 2024 (the 2023 festival
premiere doesn't count!) - but filmed in 2022 - ...well, I'd put this
much more firmly in the thriller genre than the horror genre, so
"thriller film", told in non-linear fashion that consists of 6 Chapters
(they cheat - the "Epilogue" actually makes it 7 Chapters!).
I'll stop there. I missed this. Adding it to the watch list.
Post by Ian J. BallKilling the Competition (Lifetime) - This new flick turned out better
than I expected. It wasn't as much of a slog as I was anticipating, and
Lily Brooks O'Briant's character is at least sympathetic.
The star here, of course, is Melissa Joan Hart, and she doesn't just
play the mom - she's playing a Momster!
Returning to her hometown where she was once the Queen Bee of the
high school apparently drives Hart's character nuts (as she's pretty
much a "nothing" now). She becomes obsessed with her daughter (O'Briant)
recapturing her former glory - obsessed to the point where she does
stuff like go to the school board to publicly complain, and sit in on
the cheer practices wearing a weak "disguise". But worse than all that,
she starts becoming emotionally abusive to O'Briant's character,
constantly running her down and belittling her for not being as great as
Hart's character was in high school.
They pretty much wimp out on the ending (the movie's title is a
lie!!), though I did appreciate that the very final scene lets us know
that Hart's character was still a nut job, and any contrition on her
part was almost certainly an act!
So, as "mothers from Hell" flicks go, this might have been one of
the better ones.
P.S. Please get whoever played the tall cheerleader girl her own
Lifetime flick to headline! ;p
What did you watch?
Found - I binged through three episodes. I'm almost caught up with one
more to go. The big development over the three episodes was Margaret's
son showing up. For those who don't watch the show, Margaret's son went
missing from a bus station 13 years ago when he was a young boy.
Margaret has developed a super power to now detect if someone is lying,
but she is also psychologically broken, and *obsessed* with finding her
son to the point where she was banned from the bus station because she
went there every night looking for him. Now while she was standing in
front of the station (In spite of the restraining order) this young man
shows up and she declares he's her son and he basically says sure why
not. Everyone else is shouting red flag alert but she doesn't want to
hear it. So far 2 or 3 episodes in with this guy and he's definitely
suspicious, but nothing has outright proven him a fraud. I mean sure he
refuses to discuss where he was for the past 13 years, and he refuses to
meet any relatives or anyone else who would have known him as a child
and OK, he doesn't have the mole on his arm because it was removed. But
there's nothing suspicious about that? Right? Now leave Margaret alone
and let her enjoy having her son back. Although, isn't it maybe a
little suspicious that the people who kidnapped him took him to a
surgeon to have a mole on his arm laser removed? I guess not.
The Substance (theatrical) OK, so this is going to be hard to discuss
without spoilers. I'll do my best to talk around them. This movie
stars Demi Moore as a former celebrity who now hosts a daily exercise
show. But when she turns 50 her boss (Dennis Quaid) decides she's too
old and needs to be replaced by someone younger. I'm going to pause there.
When this movie first came out I knew almost nothing about it. I knew
it starred Demi Moore as an aging celebrity who does something to her
body. And I was pretty sure it was a "body horror" movie. I was able
to piece that together through the vagueness. I didn't want to see a
body horror movie, at least not in the theater. Then I kept hearing
people who saw it talk about how great it was, but no one ever gave any
details about what actually happens. Then the movie started to get all
of these award nominations, including Best Picture, Best Director and
Best Actress. So I went to see it.
Back to the movie. Moore's character (and this is all very sketchy,
even in the movie) comes across "The Substance" if you inject yourself
with it, you are split into two people, but they are the same person.
One is a younger version of yourself (Margaret Qualley, daughter of
Andie MacDowell plays the younger Moore) that for 7 days at a time gets
to live life. But the two *must* swap places every 7 days. I'll end
the plot description there.
When the movie was over I and the audience were in stunned silence. One
guy said he was still processing it and asked me what did I think. I
told him it felt like Dennis Quaid read the whole script for the movie
and knew it was a comedy. While Demi Moore only read the scenes she was
in, and treated it like a serious drama. Seriously, Dennis Quaid's
performance is straight out of the Nicholas Cage school of not subtle
acting! I can sense at some point Quaid said, "Is that too over the
top?" and the directed said, in this movie there's no such thing as too
over the top!
That being said, this is definitely a body horror movie. Think "The
Fly" or anything by David Cronenberg. I never thought this about a
movie before, but as I was walking out I thought to myself if I was on
the MPAA, I would have rated this NC17 for the gore. But I have to
admit, those are some excellent practical effects (think, "The Fly").
However, the directing style straight up steals from "Crank" and
"Gamer." I honestly though the guys who directed that movie directed
this one. It is the exact same directing style and camera movements.
The other thought I had was it would be like if someone made original
1984 "Toxic Avenger" but cast Robert De Niro as the avenger, and he
brought his "A-game" and treated the movie seriously, while everyone
else did exactly the as in the original movie. Or if Bob Guccione
decided he wanted to make an X-rated version of Calugula, but cast
serious actors like Malcolm McDowell, Helen Mirren, Peter O'Toole, and
John Gielgud in the movie. And you don't find out what type of movie it
is until you're in the theater. Wait, that actually did happen. Now
might be a good time to mention that both Demi Moore and Margaret
Qualley do full frontal nudity in this movie. There is a lot of nudity
in this movie.
Anyway, enjoy the teaser trailer. It doesn't spoil anything about the
movie. The marketing campaign went out of their way to hide what
actually goes down in this flick:
http://youtu.be/B1B3HZRHpEw
I think I'm going to root for Demi Moore to win the Oscar tonight. Just
for having the nerve to be in this movie, she deserves it.